Marya Wright

Introduction: Marya With a Y

Taryell Simmons: Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to another episode of Rise Urban Nation. I've got a special guest in the building today, Marya. We just talked about how both of our names have a Y in them, and I heard you even spelled one of your kids' names with a Y.

Marya Wright: I sure did. I did it to her just as it was done to me. It's only right.

Taryell Simmons: Passing on the tradition. For those who don't know you, who is Marya with a Y?

Marya Wright: Marya with a Y is uniqueness. I can't find a mug at Disneyland with my name on it, but that's okay, because I like things to be creative and innovative. I'm a Black woman, a mother of two, a son and a daughter, and a wife. I come from a very small town in Humboldt County in Northern California, but that wasn't my speed. I'm more of a big-city person, so after I graduated I moved to Oakland and then San Diego. I'm a graduate of San Diego State, go Aztecs, and of Cal State East Bay, go Pioneers. And I'm a Black social worker, trying to liberate and push forward the Black agenda in our communities through my role.

Mental Health in the Black Community

Taryell Simmons: We definitely need more Black social workers. A couple of years ago I searched for Black counselors and didn't realize how hard they are to find in network. Mental health and healing wasn't something we talked about growing up. Do you see that changing?

Marya Wright: Absolutely. It's becoming more of our conversation and our norms. More Black activists, social workers and mental health providers are sharing knowledge with their community, and I strive to take what I learned in my programs and share it back. My generation and the people coming up now realize the importance of talking and expressing, and we have more of a language for it. Our parents and grandparents didn't have the language to describe behavior, emotions or frustrations. It was only happy, angry or mad, because they didn't have a safe space to learn and share.

Taryell Simmons: Is that what they call social emotional awareness or literacy?

Marya Wright: Yes. Becoming more socially and emotionally intelligent about how you react, how you engage and what your triggers are. I also talk a lot about self-awareness: how was I socially conditioned, what is my social landscape, and how do those things shape how I show up in the world today?

Therapy, Coaching and the Echo Chamber

Taryell Simmons: I feel like the pandemic made everybody deal with themselves. I almost need a therapist just to come out of the pandemic. Are you seeing that?

Marya Wright: Absolutely. We're so heightened and overwhelmed that we don't even know where base is anymore. Therapy is one way to get back to level. A therapist or a coach isn't personally invested in the outcome or your decision. They're there to guide you and provide resources, not to direct you. When you only talk to people in your echo chamber, you only get back what you already think, which feeds confirmation bias. A therapist or coach adds a perspective you may not have thought about.

Taryell Simmons: Now you're in my lane with confirmation bias. What's the difference between a therapist and a coach, and how do I decide?

Marya Wright: I'm not an expert in either, so this is from my own experience. A therapist is licensed, as a clinical social worker, a marriage and family therapist or in psychology, through the Board of Behavioral Sciences or something similar. A coach may complete a degree or certificate program. Some people are both, but their clients have to know which hat they're wearing. A therapist can provide diagnoses, take insurance like Medi-Cal, Blue Cross, Covered California and Kaiser, and work with trauma and whatever is keeping you from moving forward. A coach is more likely cash only and focuses on a specific area, like your life, your career or a passion.

Knowing Since Sixth Grade

Taryell Simmons: Social work wasn't on my mind as a career growing up. How did you get into it?

Marya Wright: It's rewarding in some ways and difficult in many. Most people don't know what they want to be as children, but I always knew I wanted to be a social worker and work for child protective services, and that's what I'm doing now. In sixth grade I picked my elective, and across the parking lot was a special day school for children who needed support physically, developmentally or cognitively. I chose to be a school support there and help those peers through their day. At first I wanted to be the voice for children who were abused, neglected or developmentally disabled and couldn't speak for themselves. Now I've shifted. I'm not the voice for other people. My role is empowering them to use their own voice and giving them spaces to share their words.

From Community College to an MSW

Taryell Simmons: Walk us through the steps, so someone listening can see your journey.

Marya Wright: I started at community college and graduated from San Diego City College, which I'm proud of. I was vice president of the student body, and I kept my counselors informed that I wanted to become a social worker and transfer. At a student fair, the people at the San Diego State booth were heads of admissions, and one was a Black woman. I connected with her and followed up when I applied. I was accepted and completed my bachelor's in social work in two years. At San Diego State I was in the Title IV-E program through CalSWEC. It supports a year of school for people going into child welfare, with an internship at the county, and you don't pay it back if you work for the county for that year.

Marya Wright: I knew a bachelor's wasn't enough for me, so I earned my master's in social work at Cal State East Bay, with internships at a foster family agency and a county child welfare agency, and then accepted work at a county in the Bay Area. I chose a path with no GRE or entrance exams, because I knew my strengths and my limitations at that time. Now I'm on the path to becoming an LCSW, a licensed clinical social worker. I finished my clinical hours and passed the law and ethics exam, which is about doing good work and not producing harm for our clients and community. Next is the four-hour clinical exam, the same across the United States. It's a standardized test, so wish me luck.

Taryell Simmons: Congratulations. I love that you knew what was right for you. We need to ask whether some standardized tests are necessary, or unbiased, for every field.

Bias, Brave Spaces and Getting to the Yellow

Marya Wright: I love the word bias. People need to become more comfortable with it, because being biased is a very human quality, and there's a whole continuum of biases. When we become aware of our biases and how we were socially conditioned, we can see how they impact others. I provide implicit bias training, and people ask, "What if I'm walking down the street late at night?" Keep yourself safe. I'm not training you on your personal life. I'm training you to be aware of how it trickles into your professional life and affects the clients you serve. When you act on something, ask yourself: am I acting on this because I'm biased right now? I help professionals who work with system-involved youth and families stay mindful of that, because it happens every day.

Taryell Simmons: In leadership development, I often say the term safe space is overused. Is it really not safe, or are you just uncomfortable? Let's get into a brave space where we can confront it and unpack it.

Marya Wright: One characteristic of white supremacy culture is the right to comfort. If you're sitting in the green, comfortable and checking the box, you're not learning. We don't want you in the red, scared and worried. But in the yellow, you're open to learning and growing. We have to help people get to the yellow so they actually use these tools.

First Jobs and Failure as Opportunity

Taryell Simmons: What was your first job, and what did you learn from it?

Marya Wright: I was a host at Applebee's, and I worked at Pretzel Time and Mrs. Fields. Those cookies are so good. They were entry-level high school jobs, though sometimes I was the only one there, managing the store and the finances. They had nothing to do with my career. But in high school I also volunteered in the summers. I rode my bike to the county office and made thousands of sack lunches for community programs.

Taryell Simmons: What is one good lesson life has taught you?

Marya Wright: Failure is an opportunity for learning. People say, "I failed, it's not for me, why did I even try?" Flip the script. If that didn't work out, maybe something else is supposed to. What can I learn? Maybe that person isn't there for me, or a different approach would work, or I can use what I prepared for something else. I've learned from every failure, minute or grandiose, and leveled up because of it. I won't accept failure as the end. I only see it as an opportunity to learn and grow.

Advice for Future Social Workers

Taryell Simmons: What advice would you give someone in high school, or in a dead-end job, who wants a career in your field?

Marya Wright: Many people want to be social workers without understanding what it is. They think it's the person who gives out welfare money or the person who takes babies. It's both and so much more. Social workers are in government, like Tony Thurmond and Susan Eggman, at school sites, in counties, running nonprofits as CEOs and presidents, and in hospitals. Don't limit yourself. What arena do you want to work in? Is there someone there whose position you want? Research that job's qualifications and description and what that person did to get there. It's not just becoming a social worker, it's what you want to do with it. Social workers are moving into spaces of innovation, and it's a great field with opportunity for growth and a chance to serve your community.

Taryell Simmons: Do you have to niche down when you study?

Marya Wright: Social work has micro, meso and macro levels. Micro is working with individuals, like mental health. Meso is the family system or groups. Macro is policy and administration. Most schools have a child welfare track and a mental health track that prepares you for licensing and clinical work, often in hospitals, and you can earn a credential to become a school counselor. My track has always been child welfare: Title IV-E in undergrad and grad school, with my research capstone on child welfare policy. The downside is that I missed a lot of clinical information, so I'm relearning it now for my license.

Diversity and Doing the Work

Taryell Simmons: What about getting more people of color into the field?

Marya Wright: In California and the Bay Area, the field is pretty diverse: Black, Latino and Latinx, Native American, and people who were in foster care who now have an MSW. The problem is less a lack of diversity than people being pushed out and positions being gatekept. And even when Black women are in power positions, it doesn't mitigate biased decision-making in these organizations. It doesn't matter that I'm a Black woman. I have to understand how I was socially conditioned and how I perpetuate white supremacy culture. The system won't change until each person acknowledges that and makes a shift. We need more people of color in these positions, but each of us still has to do the work.

Taryell Simmons: I did a training through the Rockwood Leadership Institute, and reading their list of white supremacy culture characteristics, I thought, I do that. I've got some unlearning to do. We can't fix what we don't name.

Current Projects and Where to Find Marya

Taryell Simmons: What projects are you working on, and where can people find you?

Marya Wright: I'm in three higher education programs right now. I lecture at a CSU and want to be a stronger educator, and I'm serious about becoming a social work innovator and a change agent within the child welfare system. With my innovations, I hope to provide more direct support and education to system-involved families, especially families who are separated, so they can reunify. I'm researching family reunification and hope to influence policy in the foster care system. Last year the National Association of Black Social Workers recognized me with an individual chapter service award, and I was the only person on the West Coast to receive an award at Nationals. I take that to heart, because disproportionality in foster care is impacting Black families, and they are more likely the ones not getting to reunify.

Marya Wright: My name is Marya with a Y, M-A-R-Y-A, and all my handles are Marya Wright Consulting. I'm on LinkedIn as Marya Wright, MSW. I also want to share a book on motivational interviewing in social work practice by Dr. Melinda Hohman, my professor at San Diego State. She was kind enough to include a section on my experience as a Black social worker in Oakland using motivational interviewing in child welfare. You can find all that on my Instagram or my website.

Taryell Simmons: Round of applause for everything you're doing to move the needle on social work. Any last words of wisdom before we head out?

Marya Wright: One of my favorite life hashtags is flexibility. Remain flexible as you move through life. If you missed the exit or didn't get what you hoped for, stay flexible, because you never know why it happened that way. Keep looking for opportunities, up or down. There's always room for growth.

Taryell Simmons: Beautiful. Sometimes the challenge is the opportunity. Marya Wright, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you so much.